Sunday, 27 April 2014

Like your job, love your wife.

Planes, Trains was on TV last night and I never tire of watching it. This film makes me laugh out loud, snigger and smile like a Cheshire Cat, but it also never fails to break my heart. Watching Del Griffith talk about his wife with such love... "Love, love isn't a big enough word" to then find out at the end that she passed away eight years ago (yeah OK I knew it was coming but it still gets to me every time).

I was recently very lucky to interview Howard Deutch who directed John in The Great Outdoors. Not only did he have some lovely memories of John and anecdotes from the movie, he was able to tell me a lot about John's relationship with John Hughes, their love for each other and how John Candy was a muse for John Hughes' work (Candy is in eight
of Hughes' films, he worked with him more than any other actor). Hughes had a love for characters who didn't quite fit in, the underdog - and Candy was brilliant at playing them.

I know from talking to John's old friend Jonathan O'Mara that John often despaired of his weight and feared that he would never be normal and I think this gave him empathy with those characters he later brought to life.

Anyway I digress... this weekend one of my close friends got married to one of my old friends (I introduced them) and the love in the room not only between them, but friends and family too was palpable.

This made me think of John and how Tony Rosato described to me how John was so excited "like a little kid" on his own wedding day. Watching Del Griffith last night, I am sure every time he talked with such love in his eyes about his wife that John was thinking of  his true love Rose Candy (nee Horbor) whom he married in 1979.

Recently I also know of relationships that have been sacrificed for career. As I get older I learn more and more how love is the only thing we should aspire for. So for today, Del's words of wisdom ring true more than ever (and it works vice versa).

"Like your job, love your wife."


  1. Hi Tracey, I love your blogs (I was Eddie25 previously, just updated my profile!). They make such perfect sense to me and strike a chord. I see you've started another one which I've just sneaked a peek at and will follow too. I like how you tie in your personal experiences with the John Candy anecdotes and interviews. It was lovely to read about your friends. Love is definitely what we should aspire to, to marry someone who is your best friend also must be the best thing ever. I spent twenty years in a relationship that was totally wrong for me because I 'settled' and as such I have sacrificed my chance of probably marriage and definitely children. I said I didn't want those things but it was just a defence mechanism and a protective measure as if I had been in the right relationship with the right man then I think it would have been very different. Still I am happy now, happier than I have been in a very long time so it has worked out in the end and even if I spend the rest of my life on my own then it's better than being in an unhealthy and unhappy situation. I see on your other blog you've found a man you think you will spend the rest of your life with which is fantastic; I really hope you have :-) Hope all is going well with the book. I'm sure you will 'get it out there' if that is what you truly want. Good luck with it all. X

    1. Hi there, so lovely to hear from you! How are you doing? I have spent many years of my life with the wrong man, there is nothing worse than feeling lonely in a relationship. So pleased everything is going well and you are happy now. Never say never on the marriage and children front. I am not sure if I can have kids due to a condition I have, but I am pretty sure one way or the other they will come to me - I already have three lovely God kids. The book is coming along and I am always jollied to hear from you :) Many thanks for your continued support! Much love, Tracey x

  2. Hi Tracey.
    New to your blog-I was referred by American Light and Fixture Shower Curtain Ring Division.
    What great writing: you seem like a kindred spirit. John is revered in our house. We often use PTAA and UB quotes in conversation and could recite both verbatim.
    You mentioned when Del fesses up about Marie at the end. Sure, Del moves me every time, but I always lose it when Neal has that flash of understanding, I love that you can see a myriad of realizations in an instant. My daughter and I decided long ago that Neal put Del up at his house, at least temporarily. It sounds strange typing it out, but I love those characters so much I like to imagine a happy ending for all.
    Thanks for sharing your stories! Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips.

  3. Hi Jane,
    thanks so much for your lovely message! I think you and your daughter are right, I am pretty sure Del stayed at Neal's for a while, I also think Uncle Buck and Chanice got married. I am very lucky that I am writing a biography about John, he is everything I wanted him to be and more.
    Thanks again for reading, really appreciate your comments,
    Tracey x

  4. Hi Tracey,
    Your words are, I believe, right on the money. It's so easy for the audience to emotionally invest in John Candy's characters because of those qualities. Hugs, Gloria x